Step Away from the Melon! Crimes Committed at Grocery Stores
Much like our post on crimes you can commit in a marriage, there are other public crimes that aren’t punishable by fine or jail time, but it doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be. Here are our biggest crimes committed by fellow grocery shoppers. You know who you are.
Sneezing /Coughing on Food
Okay, so you’ve got a cold. That’s fine, but please don’t sneeze or cough all over the food we might buy. Cover your mouth; get a hanky. Whatever you have to do to protect food from gathering your germs—just do it. And don’t think twice.
Not Using Tongs For Samples
Partaking in samples is all very legit. They are there for you to sample delicious things and maybe be persuaded into buying them. Fine. But, shoppers, it is not only a crime against your fellow customers but also to the grocery store and the food itself to stick your fingers into anything, especially when there are tongs right beside the container. If we could call the police on you we would.
Ducking Under the Sneeze Guard
This is in the same vein as the two crimes above. We do not want our food contaminated by other people. Now, this is hard with a lot of people shopping in the same place, but you can protect yourself and others by adhering to common courtesy. We’re always shocked by shoppers who duck under the sneeze guard to reach their food. If you’re getting a salad, chances are you can see clearly through the guard since it’s clear and you can probably reach underneath it a-okay. So, make sure you don’t dip your face under it. Not only is that gross, but it looks more uncomfortable than reaching under it easily.
We know you want to check your produce for the correct ripeness, but there is a difference between gently squeezing a fruit and manhandling it. See what you’re doing to that melon? That’s assault. And how about the rookies who don’t even know how to check for ripeness and just squeeze away, damaging fruit and vegetables that are perfectly usable in the process. Our avocados deserve better
Little Old Ladies Clogging Lines
We feel for the elderly, we do, but that doesn’t mean we don’t think they should get someone else to do their grocery shopping for them! For some strange reason, little old ladies always clog the checkout lines with counting out their change and rummaging through their coupons. We typically scan for the shortest line, but if we see an old lady at one, it’s on to the next. Take your grandkid with you; he’ll speed things along.
But we certainly don’t condone running over any old ladies trying to get to the front of the line.
Asking the Baggers to Use Both Plastic and Paper
We’re fine with grocery stores that’ve banned plastic bags—environmentalists unite! And, well, we’ve been known to still get plastic bags when we plan to reuse them. But what we will never understand understand is those who insist on baggers using both plastic and paper bags to bag their groceries. Yeah, you don’t want your paper sacks to rip, but just make sure they’re not stuffed to the brink with groceries. They won’t rip. It’s just wasteful. Where are the shopping police when you need them?
Driving Your Cart Down the Wrong Side